278: Anxiety Is Stealing From You
Welcome to another episode.
I have been thinking about anxiety. I think about it a lot. I think anyone who is experiencing anxiety knows that it's not fun to live with it. It's a huge hindrance in your life and a problem they would love not to have, right? I'm not sure people realize how much it can affect their lives. I guess I didn't realize that myself until I was not living under the cloud of anxiety any longer.
I want to go over all the ways that I see anxiety stealing from moms. I want to think of this in such a way that if you keep living with anxiety, the anxiety takes away from you monetarily, physically, mentally, and emotionally. It takes away from your time and everything else.
I'm just going to share about different categories and then the things I see inside those buckets. So, I hope you'll listen to the end, especially if this strikes a chord with you, or maybe you get angry at me. I don't know, but I'm not here to get you angry at me. I'm here to show you how this is hurting your life, and then you can get the right assistance and support. Then you can take back control of the anxiety that's ruining your life.
Let's talk about the first one. Let's talk about the money. The money that it is taking from you, since money is always a factor if someone wants to act on getting rid of anxiety for good. Let's talk about how much money it's costing you to keep managing and dealing with anxiety in your life. I want to say that I say all of this from the belief that it's possible to get rid of anxiety. Maybe you're sitting here and you're listening. You're like, Hey, you're saying all this stuff, but you're saying it to someone you know, as I believe, that there's nothing I can do about it. This is my only option, so if you can, from this point forward, just right now while you listen to this with the idea that it's possible to completely get rid of anxiety. This means it doesn't even show up like it's not there. Everything that you experience up until this point of anxiety doesn't show up. I want to talk about all the things that we do to manage our anxiety, with the belief that we have to manage it. I'm going to share if you don't have to manage it; these are all the things that are taking your money right now.
First off, all therapy bills. If you are going to therapy for anxiety, I've talked to many people who have gone to therapy for anywhere from one year to 10 years to 20 years. Whatever, however, long to deal with anxiety to manage it to be able to function. That's a lot of money. Let's do some quick math for one year and then ten years of therapy. Let's say the average session is $150, and most people go once a week. Let's say 10 weeks or 10 sessions, just because weeks can get missed. If there are 52 weeks in a year, and if we are less than 10, we have 42 weeks. If we multiply those 42 weeks by $150, that's $6300 for one year. That's just for one year of therapy trying to manage anxiety. Then, if it ends up being 10 years, we multiply that by 10 years of therapy, which is $63,000. So, this is just a very little example at first glance of the money that anxiety is costing you just trying to manage it.
That doesn't add to the anxiety medication. Something that you have to take for the rest of your life. This adds up to some daily pills that you have to take, and I have no idea how much these costs. If you take it, you know how stressful that gets. If you don't have insurance or, you know, have to change the dosage, whatever, add this on as another monetary cost. Then other things don't; they don't seem like they're costing you actual money. If we think about it, they are: for example, if anxiety or trauma are keeping you from being able to work, this cycle will continue until you get rid of the anxiety or trauma.
There's a huge cost to no income and that loss of income. Not being able to work, and then there's also this cost of all the feelings that come with not being able to work or provide for yourself. The adjustment, the pain, the sadness, the loss, the grief—all of that is a price you pay. Not being able to work can put you in this cycle, like you first did. I take jobs where I can't function. I can't or do; if I manage, then I can get it to be. We're thinking it takes years and years. Even overwhelming or scary challenging. So, let's hope for health; it's costing you and stealing from you in terms of your health when your body is in a state of fight or flight. It can't function at full capacity and efficiency.
Let's think of an animal that's being hunted in the wild. If there's an animal that's being chased, is it sleeping? Is it resting? Is it eating? Is the body digesting or healing? Not. When your body is in the same state of stress and is overwhelmed and seeing threats and dangers everywhere, it is also not healing, digesting, resting, or functioning at full capacity. Then the health problems that come are also stealing from your life, your health, and all the money you put into trying to get your health back.
This is what I see. Somebody has a physical symptom. I now have issues with my gut. I'm exhausted. I'm so tired, whatever. It is kind of like, OK, I need to deal with this thing. So, maybe you're trying different diets, nutritionists, doctors, or exercises. You're trying to get better sleep. You're trying to take better care of your physical body, yet you haven't dealt with the thing that would move the needle the most. If you haven't touched anxiety, you haven't gotten rid of anxiety. If the anxiety is still there, you can do all these things that you're doing to heal and get better. But they're not able to work at full capacity. To the extent that they would be if your body was out of this stressed-out, overwhelmed state. If you get rid of anxiety first, all these things you're doing to try to heal will work so much better.
Does that make sense? Not only is it costing you and your health, but it’s also costing you and all the money you're putting in to try to get your health back.
Let's talk about relationships. Having deep, connected relationships is one of the biggest gifts that we can have as humans. All of us long for and need this connection. We need it from another human. Anxiety can certainly get in the way of this. Whether it's through social anxiety or that anxiety is so intense that it's like this big wall that stops you from connecting with others, it truly ruins relationships.
So again, if we can think back to an animal in the wild that's being chased, that's effectively what your unconscious mind is thinking with anxiety. Is it resting and snuggling with its mate if it's being chased? Absolutely not. When you're unconscious, your mind is reading threats, dangers, and all these real or imagined threats. There's no time for resting and snuggling with your mate or taking time to go have coffee and connect with a friend. There is no time for that. It is the same way with us as humans. If our mind is so stressed out and protecting us from danger, there's no space for connecting and being present with others. It's not that you wouldn't want to or don't want to. It's a wired response in your body that's keeping you from doing that because, as it makes sense, if there's a danger, there's no resting, there's no relaxing, and there's no way you can.
I was thinking about that in terms of relationships like with your spouse or your friends or family, whatever, but let's not forget about your relationship with your kids, if you have any kids. No matter how much you want to be present and connected with your kids, if you're dealing with anxiety, your mind will be preoccupied even if you try to hide it or ignore it. And if you have dealt with anxiety, you know this—I don't even have to tell you this—that it just takes away from being connected or enjoying the moment because your mind is so wrapped up in whatever anxiety is showing up for you. But if you're dealing with anxiety, kids are always learning. They catch on to the vibrations in the way you act. If the way you act is all driven by anxiety, then they start to take on anxiety for themselves.
Someone I just met shared a story about these kids who live in a bubble in another country, where there is a huge wealth gap between the wealthy and poor. She said that she watched a little girl go out into the street and almost have a panic attack because she was told that the streets were very dangerous and were so dangerous, and those people were scary at all those things. All our fears get passed down to our kids. I know the things that you fear the most—the things that keep you trapped. I know you wouldn't wish that on your kids ever. I know you don't want your kids to experience that. It is up to us to be that chain breaker to stop that passing down of anxiety from us to our kids.
Let's talk about the quality of life. Do you think your mind cares if you're in survival mode or thriving? Do you think your mind cares if you're happy, sad, anxious, or not? It does not. It currently thinks that the more anxiety you have, the more you will be safe. If mine continues to think that there's no way you'll get out of anxiety or stop it, because it's fully understood that the more anxious you are, then the safer you are. That's what it's trying to do—try to protect you. Its number one priority is to keep you safe and alive. And if you are surviving and you're alive, your mind seems to see that as a win. Do you want to just survive your whole life? There's so much more to life than just surviving. There's so much more to life than just being terrified every single day. Anxiety takes all of your energy. It takes so much away from you in the last little one. I know there are so many more, but the last part of how anxiety is stealing from you is that it takes away your time. Have you ever experienced situations where you're going to get some things done, you have your day planned, you're going to do all these things, and then something happens that triggers anxiety in you? Suddenly, the whole day is ruined. You're just sitting on the couch, staring at the wall. You can't function anymore. Yes, I've experienced that before too.
Anxiety takes away your time, whether it's idleness or an inability to focus, function, or be efficient with tasks. Because your mind is so scattered and jumping around. Even the effort you might put into avoiding situations that might trigger you or cause you to be more anxious. Let me say one more time that it takes away from you because so much effort may be put into avoiding situations that might trigger you or cause you to be more anxious. I know all of these things can be kind of depressing, and maybe you're feeling a bit hopeless after all this.
I know I shared a lot of heavy things. I don't want to share all these things and just leave you without a way to deal with them. I share all these to show you the seriousness of the situation of dealing with anxiety. It's not something you just have to accept and don't need to do anything about. Certain ways can make this so much better.
I'm hosting a free call. It's called the three biggest myths about anxiety that are keeping anxious moms stuck in it. In this call, I will share the three biggest myths, and I'll also share how you can get rid of anxiety for good quickly, easily, and effectively. You can go to www.getridofanxietyforgood.com and register for this free call if you've been dealing with anxiety on a daily or weekly basis. You will not want to miss this call. Again, get rid of anxiety for good.
I forgot to share earlier, but I wanted to share a little experience from the moms I have been working with. Here's what one mom has to say: Before the loss of my son to suicide, I had not known anxiety. To the extent I experienced after his death. As a health professional, I knew how to calm my nervous system through movement and the senses. This did help. Although it took a long time, it was like starting over daily. Then I had an episode for three days where I could not sleep because my throat closed up every time I fell asleep. It felt like I was suffocating. I thought I was going to die. I didn't know that anxiety could manifest in this way. I had good help from friends who work with anxiety. Also, from a body movement perspective, the anxiety did subside. So, I no longer felt like I was going to die, and I could sleep for longer at a time, but the anxiety kept showing up. It was very exhausting and debilitating to be in this state of alarm. But then I had the opportunity to work with Megan, and this has helped me so much and cleared the anxiety.
Friend, take a step now toward dealing with anxiety and getting rid of it for good. It's stolen enough from you. Don't you think? Let's get you taking your power back from it so you can get in the driver's seat of your life again. Again, go to www.getridofanxietyforgood.com and join this free call.
See you next week, my friends. Take care.
Have you felt anxiety after your child died?
The racing mind, unable to sleep, waiting for the next bad thing to happen, unable to breathe, panicky kind of anxiety, whole body riddled with anxiety?
Watch my free video on anxiety and grief below!
So that you can think clearly, feel calm in your body, and live your life without the chains of anxiety.
